Two elderly ladies sit on a locker room bench, slowly…slowly…slowly putting on their shoes.

First Elderly Lady: hmph…umph…shrmph

Second Elderly Lady: rrrmph…phrmph…hmmph

First Elderly Lady: I’m telling you, Maude, I need my hands to be closer to my feet!

First Elderly Lady and Second Elderly Lady (in symphony): MWAHAHA!